Let’s Get Intimate

It has been a while since I last shared anything. And oh please, it isn’t because I am becoming a selfish son of a preacher, nor happen to be fucken dating a preacher’s daughter. But, it is all because, I have been trying out this thing called adulting, and it is truly doing a number on I. As it is known, I don’t often struggle to blend into those around, but rather cherish every single ounce of reality, vibrating in and around myself. Of course, although I love doing I, which includes pleasuring myself, I am not a total dick head. Okay, alright, I may sound as a dickhead, but truly, try to know a thing or two about I, before you initiate convincing yourself how Joseph is a complete retard and shithole.

Anyway, as I was saying, there can be an exception, especially during times of a crisis. In such moments, one may need to blend in, as a way of hiding in plain sight. And no, a firm no, I am not offering free advice to fugitives, but really, who the fuck truly knows what is right? So, why should one try to perceive and present themselves as someone else, unless, one has moved to a shady neighborhood.

The best thing I love about being random, is that I have no fear of trying out new shit. Bumping in to a stranger and initiating a conversation of what they are planning to have for lunch or dinner, is no big deal. Let us all lay out our screwed-up lives, letting it all out. In the process, emotions and feelings are sort of eliminated, to avoid hurt feelings. Unfortunately, a drawback to it is that it makes keeping close relationships difficult. This is because, one is used to a kickoff and mingle situation, to till next time, which rarely happens. Often times, many of who I encounter and be interested in, they never show up again. Initially, they are all warm, smiley, and excited, finding I to be entertaining, funny, charming, and most of all: odd and weird. As a result, many think, that I am only acting up, as a way of impressing their enchanted feelings. Days and nights swing by, as they later realize, that is how Joseph is: strange, weird, and odd, with limited respect for this thing called personal space. This scares a shit out of many, as bloody lively angels crawl out of their scared closed-off skin pores. Their inborn instinct of flight suddenly kicks in, and many fall victims. But really, I don’t think that I am an intimidating person.

I am aware of this meaningless expression I possess, and it perturbs many, living them in suspense. Situation escalates when I approach a someone, toss them a cheesy relaxed smile, accompanied with almost no blinking of a blank stare. A dear friend once told I that I need to blink often. She proceeded to claim that it was very creepy, when I stared into her eyes as we talked, without I blinking. Speaking of staring in to eyes, I have this thing also of making direct eye contact, for prolonged periods of time, during conversations. I have noticed that it freaks many out. Don’t take I wrong, I am not planning to snatch your soul, since many claim that the eyes, are the gates to one’s soul. However, I do keep direct eye contact, for a sole purpose of following a conversation. Strange reality did strike some time back during lunch with a dear friend. She told I to not stare so much into her eyes, and I decided to move my eyes down. This wasn’t the best alternative, as something lumpy caught my eyes, along the way.

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